New Year’s Resolutions That Actually Matter

Every January, we’re flooded with messages about becoming better—eat this, don’t eat that, move more, do more, be more. And while caring for our bodies is important, many parents I work with at babyREADY feel a quiet disconnect from these conversations. Not because they don’t want to grow, but because they know—deep down—that the changes that truly shape family life rarely start with a meal plan or a gym membership.

Our Children Are Always Watching

As parents, we are our children’s first and most powerful teachers. Long before they understand lectures or rules, they are watching how we respond to stress, disagreement, fear, and joy. They notice how quickly we get angry, whether we listen when someone disagrees with us, how we treat people who are different from us—and how we treat ourselves.

When we talk about “modeling behavior,” we often think about manners or routines. But the most impactful modeling happens in the hard moments:

• How do we respond when we’re overwhelmed?

• Do we pause before reacting, or do we snap and regret it later?

• Are we willing to admit when we’re wrong?

• Do we stand up for ourselves—and for others—when it matters?

  
  

Choosing Brave, Honest Resolutions

Real growth starts with gentle honesty. Not shame. Not self-criticism. Just noticing.

Many parents quietly carry things they’re not proud of:

• Getting angry too quickly

• Shutting down instead of speaking up

• Avoiding conflict even when harm is happening

• Dismissing opinions that challenge our own

• Staying silent when someone is being bullied or put down

Naming these patterns isn’t a failure—it’s an act of courage. And choosing to work on them is one of the most meaningful gifts we can give our children.

What Change Can Look Like in Real Life

Change doesn’t have to be dramatic to be effective. In fact, small, consistent shifts are often what stick.

That might look like:

• Taking a breath before responding when emotions rise

• Saying, “I need a moment” instead of reacting in anger

• Apologizing to your child when you mess up

• Practicing listening without immediately defending yourself

• Speaking up—calmly and clearly—when you witness harm or disrespect

When children see us trying, repairing, and growing, they learn that being human includes accountability and growth—not perfection.

Parenting While Queer: Naming the Reality

For many 2SLGBTQIA+ parents, this work happens in an added layer of complexity. We are raising children in a time when it can feel increasingly acceptable for people to treat queer families with disrespect, judgment, or outright hostility.

That reality is heavy. And exhausting.

But it also makes our modeling even more powerful.

When we show our children that we are proud of our family—exactly as it is—we teach them resilience. When we hold our heads high in public spaces, advocate for ourselves, and set boundaries around how we’re treated, we show them what self-respect looks like. When we call out bullying, challenge harmful language, and choose community over silence, we teach them courage.

Becoming the Best Versions of Ourselves

Being the “best version” of yourself doesn’t mean being calm all the time, or fearless, or endlessly patient. It means being aligned—with your values, your community, and the kind of world you want your child to grow up in.

At home. At work. In public.

When we commit to becoming more thoughtful, more compassionate, more brave, and more grounded, something beautiful happens: we start to feel good about who we are. Not because we’re flawless—but because we’re intentional.

A Different Kind of Resolution

This year, consider a resolution that sounds like:

• I will pause before I react.

• I will listen with curiosity, not defensiveness.

• I will stand up for myself and for others.

• I will show my child that our family is worthy of pride and protection.

These are the changes that ripple outward.

And when our children look back on their childhoods, they won’t remember whether we counted carbs or steps—but they will remember how we treated people, how we handled hard moments, and how deeply we believed in ourselves and our community.

That is a resolution worth keeping.